At my 20 week scan, I was told I had a low lying placenta and due to this I had to have a scan every 4 weeks. The consultant told me that it would likely move before 32 weeks, if it was going to move at all and if I had any bleeding to attend triage urgently. The wait between scans and the dread of bleeding became my entire world, everyday I felt a dread of what if today's the day I start to bleed. It completely took the excitement out of my pregnancy and it just became a constant worry however, I felt grateful that it was not a placenta accerta. 

Fast forward to my 32 weeks scan, I got an official diagnosis of an anterior complete placenta previa. My placenta unfortunately had not moved, not even an inch from my 20 week scan. 

As it was still completely covering my cervix, it was at this appointment I had to be scheduled in to have my baby via a c-section at 36weeks+2. 

It was explained to me that there may be a high volume of blood loss during the section, due to the position of my placenta. However, reassurance came and extra steps where taken to make sure that my placenta had not embedded itself into my uterus. 

The morning of my scheduled c-section arrived, I had a further scan to triple check that it was still placenta previa. My consultants discussed the best course of action to try and avoid going straight through my placenta, they made a plan and that’s when we headed down to theatre to welcome my beautiful baby girl into the world.

During the first part of my section, everything seemed to be going to plan, they were able to get my daughter out safely and they began to remove my placenta. It was at this time the room went completely silent, like for a minute there was no one else there but me. Although there were people around me (including my incredible partner Jack), the silence felt isolating. This was until I seen the face of one of my consultants, who peered over the drape, and explained to me that they thought this was placenta accreta and I would need to be put under general anaesthetic. 

My heart sank, all I could think was - I am going to die here today. I looked my anaesthetist straight in the eye and said "please dont let me die, I have three children" and before I knew it I was asleep.

I remember waking up in recovery, with an arterial line in, a wound drain and wires everywhere, I just lay wondering where my baby was.

I was moved to Maternity HDU and this is where I learned, that I unfortunately had a major haemorrhage during my surgery, (where I lost 3.8L of blood, resulting in 6 units of PRC and 4 FFP transfused) and that’s when the most heart wrenching news came. In order to save my life, I had to undergo an emergency total abdominal hysterectomy with bilateral salpingectomy. This essentially means they had to remove my uterus, my cervix and my fullopian tubes however, my ovaries where conserved. 

It was later explained to me that a portion of my placenta was deeply embedded within the right side of my uterus, next to my cervix and potentially extending into the broad ligament. 

During further investigation of my placenta, I learned that the type of Placenta Accerta Spectrum I had is also known as a placenta increta, and this is where the placenta deeply invades the uterine muscular wall.

My consultants where incredible and so thorough throughout my pregnancy. It was just unfortunate that where my placenta had invaded my uterus, it was within an area that was unable to be detected by ultrasound or even an internal scan.

Not only did I wake up to this heartbreaking news, I was informed that while I was under anaesthetic my daughter had become unwell and had to be taken to the NICU. She was placed on CPAP due to a condition called respiratory distress syndrome. This is a breathing disorder that is caused by lack of surfactant (a substance the keeps lungs inflated).

I never got to see my daughter for hours, and when I finally did, I was so weak and exhausted. My heart broke holding her, as we both were so fragile but yet fighting through the wires to be close to each other. I felt like all my strength had been torn away from me, but I held on to her like my life depended on it and to be honest with you, it did. My heart was shattered knowing I couldn’t protect her, I couldn't stay with her, and that I had to leave my newborn baby in the hands of someone else who wasn't me. Although the NICU staff where absolutely Incredible, I wanted to be the one to comfort my baby and I was so unwell that I could not. 

I never got all her firsts - her first nappy change, her first tube feed, her first bottle feed and I never got to be the first person to dress her. I missed out on it all and it almost feels like it was snatched away from me - all her firsts, where all my lasts and I didn’t even get to have them. 

I later got an infection, which led to me being unable to have visitors. This in turn meant I could not visit anyone either - not my baby in the NICU and not even my two other children, who where at home with my partner. I had to go 2 days without seeing or touching any of my children - this was hands down the worst part of it all. I had been through so much already, and now I was isolated to a room and was not able to cuddle my newborn baby and the only way I could see her was through pictures. 

27th of November 2025 was one of the best days of my life but it was also the worst, I lost a huge part of myself that day. Not only physically but mentally as well and I don’t know if I will ever get that part of me back but I am coming to terms with that, as I am learning to love the new version of me.